Kuciwa Lagi

Yesterday I went to see the Head of the Department to get him to sign a few papers. So since I had the opportunity to talk to him, I told him about how unsure I was about my thesis. I was so confident that I could graduate in Spring next year. It turned out that I might not have enough time to finish it by spring, and therefore needs to stay for the summer. I was devastated. I had been distracted this semester with classes and assignments that I forgot to work on my thesis. I was so sure of it last summer, but as I get to know more of the topic I became more clueless of where to begin. 

Staying here for the next summer was initially my plan B because I really really really want to go home by end of May next year. But now I realized that I had to be prepared for plan B. I'll have 3 extra months before I can go home for good. I can't bear this anymore. I'm terribly homesick and clueless right now. It's just so frustrating. It's not that I don't like NY, I just miss home (particularly that someone) so very much...

I know that I need to step up but right now, I just want to mourn. I want to talk to my loved ones. I don't want to be ambitious. I just wanna be lazy. I don't want to think about school. I don't want to do my assignments. I don't want to do anything. Sigh...