To Be Or Not To Be

Sometimes I question myself, where do I stand? Who should I follow? Am I a betrayer to my own people if I happen to to agree on other people's opinion and not my own kind? Does that makes me a bad person? I have been so blind all my life. Now I'm starting to see things. Some things that I agree and some things that I don't agree. I shouldn't be overanalyzing myself but I can't help it because that's just part of who I am. It's not a matter of who is right and who is wrong. It is about whether it is rational or not, and  whether it's fair or not. It is about time that changes are made. We are moving forward and therefore can't possibly live with old-school rules. We should open our eyes and mind and think rationally before making a decision if we want to be respected globally. 

Our own kind is dying because of the whole spoon-feeding culture. We refuse to work hard thinking that we are privileged. And what is happening to us now? We became a laughing stock. Come on, get your act together! Have you got no shame when people call you lazy? or that you are a clown? or that you are a racist? or that you're not open-minded? As much as I am a judgmental person, I want to be as open-minded as possible so that I won't be a 'katak bawah tempurung'. Being open-minded doesn't mean that we're no longer practice our culture, tradition and religion. Instead, we learn more about other things that can make us more understanding. 

I'm a proud Malay. But I get sick of my own people brag about 'kepentingan orang Melayu', 'tolong orang Melayu dulu', 'depa bukan Melayu, biaq pi la kat depa',' tak kesian ka dengan orang Melayu?', and what not. Yes, of course we have to 'kesiankan' our people but that doesn't mean that we have the rights to abandon other people. I see a lot of other races opt to live abroad instead of their homeland. Some of them do this because they look up to the 'orang putih' (another mentality that should be banished), and others is because they see that the grass is greener on the other side. They had to turn their back of their own land because it didn't do them justice. One man told me that "diorang ni (other races) kalau kasi betis, nanti nak peha! so jangan kasi." Hai, sapa2 pun kalau dikasi betis, nak paha. It's natural in every human being that we'll keep asking for more and what's wrong with that? Everyone wants a better life. It's their land too! They were born and raised here, so who are 'we' to deny their rights? I may sound like I'm standing up for other people's right (thus betraying my own kind), but that's because I believe in equal opportunity. 

So, to say that I'm betraying my people, I don't think so. I love my people but my people needs a wake up call. As for other people, I acknowledge their existence because this is their 'tanah tumpahnya darahku', they should also be given the same opportunities as much as we get in every aspects of their lives. Their forefathers maybe the ones who fled from their own land a long time ago, but not them. They were born and raised here. They have contributed so much towards our nation's independence, development, and many more. As for us, if we really love ourselves that much, get up and stand on our own feet. There's no need to just wait and be treated like 'anak raja'. Other people worked hard because they know that if they don't work hard, diorang akan ditindas. That's why they are smarter, richer, and more open-minded. Apalah salahnya kalau kita ambil sikap itu untuk diri sendiri. Imagine what will become of ourselves.